Halfway through "I'll Sleep When I'm Dead" I wished I was.

What is the worst thing that could happen to you? Something so terrible that you'd take your own life afterwords? If you answered "have anal sex with Malcolm MacDowell" then this may be your movie. The reason I rented this is that director Mike Hodges is responsible for the original "Get Carter", if memory serves, a terrific movie. Here the meandering plot, the ridiculous script, the bad acting, even the irritating score by Simon Fisher Turner makes me think that Hodges was either collecting a paycheck, or, at age 72, is in the prime of his senility.
Some mid-level drug dealer (Jonathan Rhys Myers) leaves a party one night and is ambushed and raped by Malcolm MacDowell. He stumbles home, takes a bath with his clothes on (movies love to illustrate some one cracking up by having them bathe with their clothes on) and slashes his throat. His older brother (Clive Owen) was a notorious, murderous crime boss who left London three years earlier to live the life of a lumberjack. After hearing of his brother's death, he heads back London to find out who's responsible.
To say this movie is homophobic is putting it lightly, the whole plot hinges on gay panic. Rape is horrible, of course, but the real stinger for Owen is that his brother actually ejaculated during the act (what a thorough coroner!) As he meets up with former associates he visits his pointless OLD girlfriend, played by Charlotte Rampling, who is easily older than the actress who plays his mother. Rampling has two acting modes, dull depression or dull overacting. In fact, there is a scene near the end, which is never explained, where a gunman is sitting beside her. I watched this scene three times, and judging by her facial expression, I still can't tell whether she's supposed to be dead or alive. All the actors look depressed, and seem to be going about the grim task of getting this movie over with. A few characters are introduced near the end that have absolutely no reason for being, they amount to nothing and we never see them again. Did the filmmakers run out of money near the end of shooting and just say "fuck it?" He finally catches up with millionaire and rapist Malcolm Macdowell. Who is he? Why did he do it? The screenwriter farts out the most ridiculous confession that I've EVER heard. As I type this, my heart is starting to thump with anger. Piece. Of. Shit.